Friday, February 28, 2014

Padres Look for First Spring Win


Well at least we can't lose our reigning Vedder Cup CHAMPIONSHIP during Spring Training.  The Padres dropped their first two spring games in embarassing fashion to the Mariners, but there were many bright spots.  Andrew Cashner dressed the deer and pummeled the stupid Mariners today, Cory Spangenberg showed off his range in the field, and the Padres offense is really saving their energy and production for the regular season.  That's good planning!

I love seeing the people that are legitimately overreacting about early spring performances and freaking out on the Tweeter.  These guys just finished a solid 4 months of eating cheeseburgers and justifying it by doing a token 15 minutes of lifting weights.  Just ask Jesus Montero! 

On Saturday the Padres take on the hated (?) Royals and look for their first victory of 2014.  I'm too lazy to check who's pitching for us but I'm sure it's someone great.  [Editors note: it's Ian Kennedy which is awesome].  Unfortunately, no TV for almost a week but whatever.  Radio is the theater of the mind. 

On an unrelated note, Wayne Partello, Padres bigwig, actually recognized this blog's existence.  Closet MS Paint Padres related dong picture lover?  DEFINITELY. 

Friday, February 21, 2014

Pedro Ciriaco MLB Network Sighting! Also Yasiel Puig Still the Worst.

Since I have nothing to do during the day except tend to yellow poop in diapers and bounce a baby around like a Bop It, I got the chance to watch MLB Networks top plays of 2013.  First off, it was a travesty that Will Venable's diving catch in CF didn't make it above #25.  Second, it was disheartening to see possible NEW CLOSER Joaquin Benoit giving up the David Ortiz grand slam in the ALCS as the #1 play of the year (of course it was, it involved the Red Sox - this show was quickly followed by stupid Red Sox jerk Kevin Millar on Intentional Talk).  But the real treat was seeing the "other plays that didn't make the cut" segment that featured none other than Padres star for life, Pedro Ciriaco!  Pedro is a Padre that will go down in history for both the Twitter puns and for being as exciting to watch as Deivi Cruz was.  THAT'S EXCITING!

Anyways, MLB totally sucked off Yasiel Puig like they usually do and featured his somewhat impressive throwing arm.  This reminded me how much I hate Yasiel Puig.  With those fires burning, I had to take to MS Paint to produce this NEW CONTENT. 



I also learned yesterday that nobody cares about my mediocre quality long form Padres analysis.  My Chase Headley post had a whopping 6 views as of now.  My picture of Clayton Kershaw om-noming on a MS Paint peen got 56.  Do the math business wizards.

Thursday, February 20, 2014

Chase Headley is the Iceberg the Titanic Hit



Thanks to my last week of paternity leave and a well behaved baby, I can actually write posts instead of just drawing dongs (don't worry, the dongs are coming).  I guess I could totally regret this post once the Padres are raising the 2014 World Series trophy after a Ken Caminiti-esque MVP year from Chase Headley.  But here in the world of reality, I keep seeing mentions on the Tweeter and within the blogosphere, local and national, that keep pushing the Padres to extend Chase Headley.  Change The Padres, a movement I fully support, has made it a bellwether for the new ownership's supposed commitment to winning.  I still remember when Chase was called up to play left field (we clearly couldn't displace Kevin Kouzmanoff at 3B) and became our great hope for the future.  What we got was middling power, a decent glove, and OK average which we would blame on him playing out of his natural position of 3B.  Then at 3B, we get the 4 HR season (granted with an OPS of .773).  I'd say Headley mania had bottomed out around then.  Out of nowhere, we get the 2nd half of 2012 where Chase became Caminiti reincarnated, but without all of that awesome crack.  The clamor picked up to extend him NOW (at the height of his value).  Thank christ the team waited, and we were treated to another moderately above average season at the plate.  Word on the street is that signing Chase Headley would take about $15 mil a season, or about what we paid Chan Ho Park his last season in San Diego. 

Now Chase Headley doesn't want to negotiate until after the season.  And yet people are yelling at the Padres for not committing to our "star".  Newsflash, here are his Baseball Reference comparables: Mark Teahen, Gabe Kapler and Terrence Long.  YES, FORMER PADRE TERRENCE LONG.  Can you imagine what the reaction would have been like if in 2006, Kevin Towers announced to the world that he was signing Mark Teahen (after his best season) to the largest contract in Padres history?!  I get it, Chase Headley is homegrown and we've gotten to see many disappointing seasons out of him plus one totally awesome one.  Thinking he even wants to re-sign here and pass up a free agent bonanza is wishful thinking at best.  A 36 year old Carlos Beltran with similar OPS+ last season just got $15 mil a year, you don't think Chase Headley can beat that?  Even with it being reported for well over a year now that the Yankees like him and need a 3B? 

It's time to move on.  He's not going to be here next season, and if he is, it will have been a colossal mistake that will sink the Padres for years to come.  As long as Mike Dee and the Padres ownership keeps payroll where it's at, a $15 mil mistake is a franchise killer that will force the team to be even less active than they already are (granted, they are really great at committing 25% of the payroll to closers) in free agency.  Hedge the risk, ship him off while you can still get something for him, and start getting Jedd Gyorko to take infield at 3B.  And then, unlike past Padres ownership, actually spend that money on player acquisition (international, free agency, wherever) instead of pocketing it and reinforcing the Padres position as most profitable team on the Forbes rankings. 

P.S. It should be noted that Chase Headley is a really nice dude.  I've met him, he's cool.  But we're chasing championships here ideally.

Saturday, February 15, 2014

State of the Padres Blogosphere

When I was living on the East Coast for a decade, I became so desperate for Padres baseball that I started Alta Vista-ing some of those newfangled weblogs that were marginally covering the Padres.  Over time, blogs started maturing, gaining followings, and finally, last season, really getting the attention of the team.  I still remember how excited I got when I discovered Gaslamp Ball and could watch the Rally Unicorn (TM) do it's magic to help the Padres win, when I found The Sacrifice Bunt and could read Melvin's in depth articles on Padres statistical minutiae, or when I found Geoff Young's writing on mid 90's Padres obscure players and Steve Poltz (which convinced me to buy each version of the Ducksnorts Annual).  Basically, I could watch Baseball Tonight for an hour and catch 15 seconds of Padres highlights in the last 2 minutes of the broadcast, or I could start reading Padres blogs. 

Anyways, it's a totally different world now.  Blogs are pulling in many thousands of readers a day, or in the case of Padres Jagoff, many ones of readers a day.  Gaslamp Ball is part of the ubiquitous big business of SB Nation, Friarhood is producing and selling a number of awesome shirts to go along with in depth coverage, and a collection of smaller Padres blogs entered into a joint venture that resulted in Padres Public.  Seriously, who could have guessed that mergers and acquisitions plus joint ventures would be a part of the Padres blogosphere.  The Padres had always thrown a few bones to the larger blogs, maybe at least acknowledging they existed and occasionally granting some short interviews.  Tom Garfinkel did a great job of at least trying the social media thing, occasionally tossing out some seat upgrades via the Tweeter.  But last season, it seemed like Garfinkel's last hurrah was to really try and embrace the bloggers.  The team and their new TV partner, Fox Sports San Diego, really started pushing the social media thing.  Whether this was an initiative created by Garfinkel and his office, or from some lame consultants that told the Padres they needed to embrace the hot new buzzwords like social media, at least it happened. 

While much of the Padres social media initiative involved either Padres Public and Gaslamp Ball, it was nice to see the blogging community recognized.  In Spring Training, FSSD had a handful of bloggers provide color commentary (Mike Dee, I will literally fellate you if you select me for this this season.  AND SWALLOW) for an inning at a game.  FSSD also started featuring Social Media Tuesday which basically just involved a lame Twitter poll and a couple Tweets shown at the end of the game.  The Padres Social Media Night has been an annual occurrence, and 2013's was fantastic, offering many of us the last chance to meet the great Jerry Coleman before his sad passing. 

In addition to the Padres' efforts, I think many of the blogs have done such a great job that the bloggers, for me, are almost as famous as the players on the field.  When I'm walking the Petco corridors and run into Jbox, Rick from RJ's Fro or Sac Bunt Melvin, I feel like I should pull out a baseball and get their autographs.  God knows what I'd do if I ever met Dex.  Meeting Dex would be like the equivalent of pulling a super rare, limited edition hand signed baseball card out of a pack.  THAT'S SCARCE!  Padres Public's Padres and Pints has brought in local TV celebs and made the Padres Public dudes into multimedia stars (invite me on!  I like binge drinking and Padres!).  

Looking at 2014, I expect more of the same.  The only question is if the Mike Dee regime will value the bloggers as much as Tom Garfinkel.  So far, I haven't seen any evidence of outreach other than converting the terrible suite off the Padres store that rarely got bought into a Social Media Lounge for FSSD.  The big question is if Mike Dee sees value in reaching out to the blogs, although I will note that he has already responded to two Padres Jagoff tweets.  HE KNOWS I EXIST!  Garfinkel pretty much ignored everything I sent to him, even legitimate season ticket holder issues (except for the time I tweeted that the 1998 Reunion Night game could use more Third Eye Blind - he agreed and then didn't put on any Third Eye Blind). 

Thanks to my 3 week old baby girl, I had to skip out of Padres Fanfest before the partying began, but I heard the Friarhood and Padres Public meetups were awesome.  Luckily, with my plan to drag the girl to a ton of games this year, I'll be able to crush some Sculpins at Petco with an Ergobaby on and hopefully meet up with some of the blog superstars.  Here's my look at the current 2014 Padres Blogger Power Rankings:

1.  Gaslamp Ball - It's tough to beat the 500 lb. behemoth.  They've got the backing of the largest sports blog network, a collection of writers across the country, and like 10 years of history.  Plus who doesn't enjoy thethingwynn's Padres
baseball card coverage.

2.  Padres Public - Combining the various niche Padres bloggers into one SUPER BLOG (similar to 80's SUPER BAND Asia) was genius.  The Padres slurped this up and made Padres Public the darling of their social media marketing efforts. 

3.  Friarhood - Steve Adler has put out some awesome clothing that I see all over Petco.  I'd consider rating the Friarhood higher, but his articles don't show up on my iPhone.  They don't format for mobile and I don't feel like zooming in on my phone and panning the screen for every line.  What I've seen is great, but I just don't read articles on my computer that often. 

4. Corey Brock - The official Padres blogger.  Writes great articles, has great articles, but is a company man putting out the company line.

5.  @padres2014 - Not a blog, but your #1 source for Padres puns during games on the Tweeter.  Great one liners.

6-1008.  Everyone else.

1009.  Padres Jagoff - Obvious Reasons.  Dongs.  Padres.  MS Paint.